


Falling...

by one_dream_made_flesh



Category: Florabella - Fandom, Florence + the Machine
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/F, Florabella, Lesbian, Sentimental
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-26
Updated: 2015-12-01
Packaged: 2018-05-03 13:06:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5291963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_dream_made_flesh/pseuds/one_dream_made_flesh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They fell in love, but not at the same time, both afraid to face up to their feelings for each other and lose what they had.<br/>Could now be the right time to say it aloud?</p>
<p>Set at different periods (2009 to 2014).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First time I'm writing from Isa's POV.  
> Planning to write three chapters.
> 
> Dates are not accurate, only for the sake of a timeline. 
> 
> Still working on the dialogues.  
> Hope this is not too sappy.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> *************************

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the start she knew that she wanted Flo.
> 
> How much is Isa willing to risk, will it cost what they built all these years?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not smutty at all.
> 
> *******************************

|| Spring of 2013 ||

You say you don't regret any of it. But why does it seem so painful to just admit it? Only a few words uttered out loud. It's all in your eyes, and how your body reacts to my touch. I found home within your embrace.

When will you stop running away?

|| Sometime in 2009 ||

It's the last gig of the tour and we are both tired but happy with the recognition by our peers and fans.  
You’re mostly drunk every night and grumpy and hung over the next day, since you can't stay in bed until you wish... There’s press and rehearsals and all of that.

I try not to drink too much, I must take care of you. Sometimes watching you snogging boys and girls all the time hurts me. But I never say it, I just smile, and later cry myself to sleep, whenever you’re passed out by my side or I'm alone late at night.

The guys wanted to celebrate the successful last concert but I preferred to go to the hotel directly. Take a long bath, order room service and watch some tv.  
You had a bit to drink but rejected the boys' invitation and told them you’re staying in tonight. I feel a bit nervous, it's the last night in this city and tomorrow starts our two weeks break, then we go back into the studio. I don't want to say goodbye to you, so I gather all my courage, I'm confessing it tonight, it's been torture for too long.

I don't know if you even remember the last time we kissed then it led to making out, then we were going all the way, you laughing afterwards at how intense it all was.  
But usually no words were said in the morning.

Tonight I'll keep sober and I’m saying all that’s been bottled up these six months.  


"Do you want to take a bath first, Flo?", I ask you, and without replying you undress and get in the shower. I’m used to seeing you naked, but still go out of breath looking at you, and how beautiful you are, memorising each bruise you have and every curve on your body...

You notice me staring but you don't mind, I turn my back and close the door behind me.  
Then it's my turn. When I get out you’re drinking vodka from a bottle.  
"Want some, Isa? Come on, let's celebrate.",  
I reply I don't want to spoil my appetite for dinner and ask you to stop too and have dinner with me.

There's nothing interesting on tv but I haven't been paying attention anyway. We're cuddling and I’m concentrating on the rhythm of your breath, feeling the warmth of your body. I feel too hot already and make the first move.  


I touch your cheek and brush some strands of hair that were falling over your face. You close your eyes and bite your bottom lip, I see that as a sign and kiss you. Soon clothes are off and no words are necessary, just the music our bodies and moans then turned into screams make, a most beautiful symphony.

We're lying together and I’m running a finger along your forearm, you still shivering to my touch. You kiss me again, deeply and slowly, there’s no other place I'd rather be, no other mouth I crave, no other body that would make me feel like Heaven as when we're this close.

You are almost falling asleep and I haven't said it yet.  
My hands are sweating and I feel butterflies in my stomach but it's now or never.  
"Are you sleeping?", I ask and you mumble something but I move from our embrace and you sit up and open your wides wide, asking "What's wrong, Iz?"  
I breathe in and try to think before I say it, too anxious to think straight but I have to do it.  


"I’m in love with you", that’s all I manage to say and I try not to let my tears show. The fear of losing you is as big as my need to be honest at last.

I can't read your expression, it's a mix of confusion , embarrassment and sadness, I’m already regretting to have said it and fucked it up, thinking things will never be the same again.

You stare into blankness for some minutes, I don't know if I get up and run or if I turn my back and pretend to sleep.  
The revelation seemed to have sobered you up.  


You finally say it, your eyes blurred, I don't know if by anger or sadness. I fail to read you.  
"I’m sorry, but I can't", that’s all you manage to reply, now we can't turn back time.

I can't take it, for the first time I feel awkward around you.  
I get up, get dressed. You don't ask me to stay, I don't offer any explanation. I just leave.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The heart wants what the heart wants.  
> Unrequited love can be a bitch, but is it really one-sided?  
> Isa doesn't seem to want to risk it just yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a long chapter, building up for the conclusion.
> 
> Dates are not accurate, only for the sake of a timeline.
> 
> I'm experimenting with first person narrative still.  
> Isa's POV.
> 
> *********************

|| Late 2010 ||

"Are you sure?", I enquire quite concerned. She just had a dramatic break up but wants to go out dancing at the new club somewhere on the West Coast.  
We'll probably get drunk and stumble to our hotel room. Good thing we have the day off tomorrow.

I can never say no, so we go.  
We are dancing dangerously close, an excuse for us to touch each other.  
After my confession, we were back to that best friends mode, then Flo got back with her boyfriend, so every time we touch, as fleeting as it may be, I secretly cherish it, wishing time would freeze.  


We had a blast and it's almost dawn. The alcohol in our systems is starting to wear off but she's still electric. I have to remind her most guests are sleeping, and it's a bad idea to listen to rave music full volume and dance around the room at this hour.

We stand beside each other watching the sun rise. The room offers a view to the Ocean and waves are crashing hard, my heart is as agitated as those waves.  
There's a storm inside me, only one person can make it calmer.  
But I'm not risking it again.

I'm pouring us some coffee (Hell, I need that!), she comes behind me and puts her arms around me, smelling my hair then kissing the top of my head.  
We stay like this for a couple of minutes, she whispers something silly in my ear and I know I won't resist her. 

The storm is going away.  


There's so much I want to say but this is not the right moment. I simply let my body talk. I turn around and pull her close, she searches for my hands, entwining our fingers.  
Then I'm back against the wall.  
How long I've waited for this!

For a couple of months, drunken kisses and sex in hotel rooms become a routine.  
I still can't read her. Why do I do this to myself? How many boyfriends will come and go until it's me the chosen one?  
Should I stop it cold turkey?

Well, it seems I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't.

|| Sometime in June, 2012 ||

We don't see one another as much as we used to anymore. I'm doing some work in America and going on dates with a couple of girls. She has a new boyfriend she seems crazy about. There's still some gigs to play and music to make, we get along splendidly. 

|| December, 2012 ||

My heart aches for her and I can't make these thoughts go away...

I just wish she felt the same for me.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is never too late.
> 
> Isa and Flo's feelings were out of sync for a time. But patience and love always win.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dates are not accurate, only for the sake of a timeline.
> 
> Isa's POV.
> 
> Yes, it's sentimental stuff.
> 
> *********************************

|| March 2013 ||

We're recording some stuff in a small studio in Jamaica, it's joyful but also hard work. The writing and endless discussions are quite stressful. But I'm with her and it all feels so right.

I suggest we should find a bar, let our hair down, have some fun.  
"Let's forget about work and deadlines", I propose.  
Florence agrees and we don't even have to dress up, it's just around the corner and no paparazzi are around, neither do we care about impressing any hipsters anyway.

It's a Tuesday, the bar is not crowded and we can be normal girls having some drinks, without becoming the center of attention for a change.  
I am so happy we're here and it's now, so I relax and enjoy our night out.

You look so beautiful without make up, not having to play the rockstar for a while makes you more relaxed, and it's just like it was back when we were getting to know each other.  
We used to have so much fun together. I wish it could always be like this.

I drink more than I'm used to and strike a conversation with the locals, including the musicians playing here tonight.

A pretty tall brunette sits by my side, she speaks with an Eastern European accent. Eva is her name, I just say I'm Isabella, I don't care if she knows I'm Isa Machine.

You have taken some time to refresh yourself in the restroom and when you come back she and I are laughing and the woman has her hand on my knee. I don't even notice she was flirting with me, and when Eva asks if I would like some company, you eye her, anger clouding your judgment. 

Alcohol makes you brave and you stand beside me, pulling me close to you possessively. Throwing a stern look to the attractive brunette, you tell her rudely "She's with me, now bugger off!"  
Then you plant one on me right there for all to see.  
The lady is both amused and embarrassed, but she leaves before I have a chance to apologise.

I am quite turned on by your fit of jealousy and keep kissing you, both of us too drunk to be discreet.

When we are back at our hotel room, you sleep a little then wake up having one of your panic attacks. You dread someone telling the papers they saw us making out, you want to ring the team in London and swear you won't leave this room ever.

I manage to calm you down, saying no one recognised us.

You apologise for you were too drunk to know what you were doing.

But you obviously know what you're doing know, and when I ask if you want me, you just nod and we're all over each other again.

|| Early 2014 ||

Something changed and we both know it. You aren't afraid to show how you feel anymore. Not only after drinks in the dark or when you're desperate for affection.  
I'm always up for it and you know it.

We can't stand being away from one another for more than two days now.

It takes a bit until you finally say it, first with your eyes, then small gestures. You finally utter it aloud "I want to be with you, I'm in love with you", but you seem insecure because you think it may be too late now. You're afraid I don't feel the same anymore.

It will never be too late. "I would wait for you forever", I tell you, no need to hide my tears anymore.

Forever begins now.


End file.
